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  1. #1
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    Dec 2009


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    1. As you get older three things happen.
    The first is your memory goes, and I can't
    remember the other two...
    -- Sir Norman Wisdom

    2. One of the most difficult things in
    the world is to convince a woman that even
    a bargain costs money.
    -- Edgar Watson Howe

    3. A true friend is one who overlooks
    your failures and tolerates your success!
    -- Doug Larson

    4. A harmful truth is always better then
    ...a useful lie!
    -- Eric Bolton

    5. When I was a kid I used to pray every
    night for a new bike. Then I realized that
    The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole
    one and asked him to forgive me.
    -- Erno Philips

    6. I only go to work on days that don't
    end in a 'y'.
    -- Robert Paul

    7. We spend the first twelve months of
    our children's liv! es teaching them to
    walk and talk and the next twelve telling
    them to sit down and shut up.
    -- Phyllis Diller

    8. Laughter is the closest distance
    between two people.
    -- Victor Borge

    9. Start every day with a smile and
    get it over with.
    -- W.C. Fields

    10. Everything is funny as long as
    it is happening to somebody else.
    -- Will Rogers

    11. Always get married early in
    the morning. That way, if it doesn't
    work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.
    -- Mickey Rooney

    12. Women now have choices. They can
    be married, not married, have a job, not
    have a job, be married with children,
    unmarried with children. Men have the
    same choice we've always had: work or prison.
    -- Tim Allen

    13. If you never want to see a man again,
    say, 'I love you, I want to marry you. I want
    to have children...' - they leave skid marks.
    -- Rita Rudner

    14. I'm not afraid to die. I just don't
    want to be there when it happens.
    -- Woody Allen

    15. Advice is what we ask for when
    we already know the answer but wish we
    -- Erica Jong

    16. Don't take life too seriously,
    you'll never get out of it alive.
    -- Elbert Hubbard

    17. Always and never are two words
    you should always remember never to use.
    -- Wendell Johnson

    18. In life, it's not who you know
    that's important, it's how your wife
    found out.
    -- Joey Adams

    19. I've been in love with the same
    woman for forty-one years. If my wife
    finds out, she'll kill me.
    -- Henry Youngman

    20. Have you noticed that all the
    people in favor of birth control are
    already born ?
    -- Benny
    ...being a human...

  2. #2


    Ɩ σиcɛ нα∂ α нɛαят...
    ιт ωαƨ тяʋɛ...
    иσω ιт'ƨ ɢσиɛ ғяσм мɛ тσ ʏσʋ...
    ƨσ тακɛ cαяɛ σғ ιт...
    αƨ Ɩ нαʌɛ ∂σиɛ...
    иσω ʏσʋ нαʌɛ тωσ αи∂ Ɩ нαʌɛ иσиɛ.



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